A loss...

When I snapped out of my recent bad habits, it was Tuesday last week, and I worked out it was exactly 3 weeks to Christmas, so I have decided to weigh in on Tuesdays to try and get back to goal for then (with Jenn). So today's weigh in, even with particularly bad TTOM bloat, is a loss of 1.5kg, which leaves me 2.5 kg to lose for the next two weeks. So its doable, at least I believe it is!! I do understand it won't be easy as it gets closer to Xmas... but I am willing to take the challenge on and do my best. Feeling very positive at the moment!

Is a pattern developing?

I seem to desert my blog when I put on weight... not that surprising really! No one likes confessing their sins. Except when you are ready to put it behind you and get on with things. Which correlates with me returning to my blog :) So my slip up this time was associated with my birthday/enagagement revellery (read binging) that I wasn't particularly quick to end. That is such an awful word, binging. But it's an awful truth, that I still binge occasionally. I wish I knew why. In an effort to try and test why I binge, I am going to start introducing regular small treats eg small glass of red wine, few squares of good dark chocolate (still contributing something to my nutrition!!). This is to see whether or not the reason why I binge is because I feel deprived and "too good" all the time. I'll let you know how I go.

Anyway, this post is sounding a bit solemn, when actually I am feeling fabulous! I am back on track (with the help of Jenn's lovely emails :)) with my food and exercise, I have started running again (yay!!!), I have an MP3 player so I have downloaded lots of inspiration tunes for my workouts, and this weekend my fiance and I have made some very relieving life decisions! I have been a bit worried about finances, and we have decided to put certain things on hold, so we can improve our financial situation, so we can choose what direction to move in next. All sounds a bit cryptic... it will be revealed in time :)

We're engaged!!!

Hello fellow bloggers- well I ended up having a fab birthday as my boy proposed to me on my birthday eve!!! It was so exciting!!! He took me away for my birthday to Coogee. Coogee has lots of memories for us- we first went out for drinks in Coogee the first day we met in the flesh (we met online). So he popped the question there at the Palace in a quiet corner on a sofa. He apparently wanted to propose on the beach, but the weather was the pits, but it was still very lovely and very symbolic. We've come a very long way since we first drank there about 5 years ago! We've overcome lots of obstacles, the biggest one being 12000 miles (Scoop is from England)!

Oh Happy Day

Good news- I lost 1.5kg, so I'm back down to 68kg (WW goal)! But even more good news is that I feel I'm more "in the zone" than what I have been recently. I have got back into using Calorie King to track my food, and next week I am starting running again! Yay! My two months off is up, so I am going to ease myself back into it gently- no hills! I've been doing a bit of reading, and I think the pain I got in my hips was from running for too long up too many hills too soon! So easy does it this time. But I just can't wait to feel how it feels to run again... I always felt so strong and free when I ran.

I went to the Dr's this last week to finally ask why I feel so tired all the time. I really struggle at work sometimes, and it is affecting my performance. I had a bunch of blood tests and it showed I was low on iron stores. The dr wasn't sure if that was enough to cause my fatigue, but I am going to try and sort it out and see if it makes a difference. I think if I still have issues, I might see a dietician. I am trying use all the stuff I know on nutrition to plan the most healthy diet I can, but maybe I'm missing something... I know I severely lack healthy fats! So that's one thing I am trying to redress at the moment.

Tomorrow is my birthday- I turn 29... the last of my twenties.... oh dear! Anyway, my lovely man is taking me away to the Crowne Plaza at Coogee for the weekend as my present, but it looks like we lucked out on beach weather! I'm not bothered though, as we can still drink, eat and be merry :) The hotel has a gym so I can still work off a bit of the eating!! The plan is to eat very light during the day, then treat myself at dinner tonight and tomorrow night, cause it is my birthday after all!!! Have good weekends my friends xxxx

Tagged by Nic

Ohh, I've never been tagged before! How exciting!

Four dishes I like to cook:
1. Chocolate Brownies
2. Banana Bread
3. Chilli Carbonara
4. Butterscotch Pudding

Four qualities I admire in people:
1. Compassion
2. Tactfulness
3. Eloquency
4. Loyalty

Four places I've been:
1. Britain
2. Ireland
3. Sunshine Coast
4. Gold Coast

Four things in my bedroom:
1. Tower of magazines
2. Tissues
3. Phone
4. Laundry basket

Four dirty words that I like to use:
1. Wanker
2. Arsehole
3. Shithead
4. Twat
(I've used all of the above recently to describe my sister's cheating fiance....)

I have no idea who to tag... I know- Jenn! Other than that I have no idea, as I don't think many people actually read my blog other the Xmas challenge people and Jenn.

As promised....

Here is my weekend food plan! Ok, this is a tad boring, but hopefully by writing on here, I will be determined to stick to it!

Saturday
Breakfast: All Bran, banana, skim milk, small glass of brekkie juice
Lunch: Mountain bread wrap with LF ricotta, shaved ham and dribble of sweet chilli sauce.
Dinner: Vegies and rice noodles (healthy takeaway!)
Snacks: Kiwi fruit x 2, nectarine
Exercise: Boxing and weights @ gym.

Sunday
Breakfast: All Bran, banana, skim milk, small glass of brekkie juice
Lunch: Medium sushi lunch box (out shopping!!!)
Dinner: Roast vegies and chicken breast (healthy version using spray oil)
Snack: WW Muffin Break muffin, kiwi fruit.
Exercise: 40 min walk.

Right... now I just have to do it.... one choice at at a time :)

At my wits end

I am over myself... I just can't get my head together at the moment.

I gained 2kgs this week.

2kgs.

Ok, I am just gonna type for a bit and see what falls out of my head... hopefully something that I can then use to try and get off this merry-go-round of gaining and losing.

My eating is almost compulsive at the moment... its like I just let myself go out of control, not even think before I put something in my mouth. Most of the time I'm not even hungry, and in fact already full, so consequently make myself feel ill by shovelling more food in my mouth. I become ashamed of myself and then eat more to make myself feel better. Why I do this in the first place? I would love to figure out that answer.

Bottom line is I still have food issues!!! But there is something that has been distinctly lacking of late- a food plan! So the first step to getting off this ride is making a plan and keeping a diary. But there is something I am going to try and do a bit different... eat just a little more than I was eating when I was being strict. Why? Maybe if I feel a little less hungry/deprived, I won't be so quick to start bingeing!

Stay tuned for my weekend food diary x

STS: all good!

I weighed in at 67.5 kg today, so really happy with that! Its my goal to not have anymore gains till mid December when the silly season starts to kick in, so its good to achieve that the week after I set the goal!!! Would have been really bad if I had gained: it sets me up for a more positive week this week coming. I certainly feel more positive- I am starting to see results in my weights program, and I have no social events on that could divert me from my course, so I am hopeful for a loss next week.

That's better!

I LOVE Friday weigh-ins. I'm down 1.5kg from Monday, so I'm currently 67.5kg. I feel motivated to be good this weekend, but I know that if I do slip up, I still have a good chance of getting back in front for weigh-in! And ultimately that's what I need to do for the rest of my life if I want to maintain my weight-loss: balance my indulgences on the weekend with weekday discipline.

I get to finish early today to travel up on the train to Scone... very exciting! Have a great weekend x

Slack Bum

I have been a major slack bum with blogging lately- for good reason- I have been hiding! I didn’t lose my gain from the previous week: I in fact gained another 0.5 kg! My week spent with my sister proved to be a week of extremes- either really good choices or very poor choices. Most lunches I had cake, as I was comfort eating. I felt isolated working in the company that I was trialling at. And I also had to contend with socialising choices. I went out quite a few times with my sister for tea, so I am actually surprised I only gained 0.5kg!

There were some activities that I did that I worked up a sweat with while I was away. My sister took me to her gym on the Thursday, and on the Sunday we went to Nelson Bay for a walk (up a very big hill!) and a swim. No to mention the steps I would have clocked up on the trial. The tile manufacturer that I was working at was in a building that was probably a km in length!

This week has been pretty good so far. I have been back to my normal good eating- there have been some unforeseen bad food moments (work lunch, farewell morning tea, free bag of candy from the newsagent!) but I cut back on other stuff to compensate, and have been trying to be consistent with my weights and cardio this week, so I certainly feel skinnier than I was when I come back from my sister’s.

I have made a decision to move my weigh-ins back to Friday. I find Monday weigh-ins soul destroying! I had moved it to Mondays in the hope it would motivate me on the weekend to make very good choices. Alas, it’s not worked that way for me! I am going to be tempted on the weekend, and I am going to indulge half the time. I find the good thing about a Friday weigh-in is that it motivates me after a weekend blowout to jump back on the bandwagon straight away as I have four days to redeem myself.

I am travelling up to Scone this weekend to go to a country village ball with my family, so really looking forward to that. I have a plan: I am going to drink the new diet-friendly fizzy wine (Jewel Yellow) and snack on chopped up vegies, rice crackers and light dips as its BYO. I’ll have my dinner before the ball as well, so I should be pretty full before I go. And I have planned an equipment-free cardio and resistance workout for Saturday morning as well, so I reckon next week will be an even better result!

My new Xmas Challenge goal- not to have any more gains… at least not until a couple of weeks before Xmas when it starts getting silly with Xmas parties!!!!

Bad Result

I don't what is going on at the moment in my head, but it is being REALLY unhelpful at the moment! Yesterday I couldn't stop shovelling food into my gob, even though after a bit I just wasn't hungry. Lesson learnt- I am a boredom eater! I weighed in at 68.5 kg- 1.5kg up on last week. My mitigating circumstance is that I got my period this morning, which could account for a bit of the gain, and a lot of the munchie attack :)

I have a challenge this week as it looks like I will travelling away for work for this week and maybe into next week. I'll be staying at my sister's, but will have to make sure that despite the fact I am away from my normal routine, that I make the best choices possible. I'll go do my own grocery shop, and my sister will take me to her gym.

I had a really good weekend other than my food slip ups! Went for some fabulous shopping in the city with Miss Donna, and met Emma and her mate Hannah- lots of fun!!! Not only was it fun, but extremely productive- I managed to get nearly all the accessories for my Gundy Ball outfit. And then I met my boy in Parramatta for drinks and a lovely Italian meal- ohhh romantic!

I am getting to the "sick of stuffing around" stage again... I guess I lost a lot of motivation since I have got to my WW goal. But this up and down business is doing my head in... I have a goal for this week: do 6 x 30 min of full-on cardio work. I have made cardio less of a priority of late, but that is ultimately what is going to get me to the weight I want to be and keep me there. Watch this space!

Good result

Just a quick post to let you know I weighed in at 67kg- so lost 2.5kg for the week, and back in front of my goal weight by a kg, and also a kg down for the Xmas Countdown!! Yay! I have this theory that if I can just be really good this week, consolidate the loss and maybe lose a little more, I will never be over my WW goal weight again.... unless I completely lose the plot of course! Good theory? Wish me some will power!

Good week! Oh, and I am a crap swimmer!

I've had a really good week this week food-wise and exercise-wise, so I am pretty excited about tomorrow's weigh-in. Its the first time in ages that I have really been committed to my food plan, especially on the weekend. My weekends have bloody atrocious lately! So while I have strayed a little off my plan this weekend, its still been light years better than what it has been!

Yesterday I went to the local aquatic centre and swam laps... I was awful!!! It just goes to show even though you might have a high level of fitness in one activity, that doesn't necessarily translate to another activity. The fear of drowning is such a great motivation to finish swimming a lap ;) I have never been a strong swimmer, but I would consider myself "competant" ie I can float and not drown... but after I'd done a few laps and started getting tired I inhaled so much bloody horrible chlorinated water! I managed to do a 30 min session of 12 laps alternating between freestyle, breastroke and backstroke, with lots of recovery in between each lap! I reckon this could be my new challenge, cause I was that bad I can only get better :) The fact I was so knackered must have meant it was a great workout!

How skinny am I!!!!

Okay Jenn, I feel sufficiently guilty enough to stop being so lazy and write a post :) The above pic was taken a couple of weekends ago when Mum and Dad came to visit. Scoop won't be happy I posted this as he reckon he looks ill, but I really like it... especially for the fact I keep looking at it in astonishment at what I look like! I look so skinny even if I'm wearing horizontal stripes!

One of the reasons I haven't posted is that this week gone I gained a whole kg... but this week is looking up and I was naughty and snuck a peek (yes Jenn, me too- psychic sisters strike again!) and I was down 1.5kg back down to goal... just have stick to my guns and be good the rest of the week, I'll back on track!!!!

One reason that things have got easier for me is that my darling boy Scoop has jumped on the healthy living bandwagon as of this week. He has started cutting back on the bad food and started the Couch to 5km program, so its happy days in the Cooper/Moran household! It makes healthy eating so much easier when you and your partner want to eat the same good things... no chocolate, ice cream or chips to try and dodge!!!

The loves of my life

This would have to be the most adorable picture I have ever taken- Scoop and Mia on our lounge at home.

Bugger

Well as some you already know, work has restricted net access at work so I won't get to blog as regularly as I have been! Boo!!! I will try to catch up with everyone's blog at home when I can- please don't think I've forgotten about you, its just a bit harder to catch up now!

The end of the week has been pretty good food-wise- I had to face the dreaded all-you-can-eat buffet last night though. I was very good to start with (short soup, salad, king prawns, smoked salmon- avoided all the deep-fried chinese foods!) but then I hit the dessert bar- my nemesis! I had good intentions and started off with the least damaging dessert pavlova, but the chocolate fountain was calling my name, and succumbed to two skewers of marshmallows dipped in the fountain :( Ah well- it tasted good!

Tonight we are off to a Greek restaurant, so will try and eat the most healthy option there! I think Greek food can be pretty good, as long as I stay away from the bread and dips!

Hope you are all having fab weekends, especially all the New South Welshmen having long weekends xxxx

Positivity

I sat at my desk here at work this morning dreaming about lying on a beach doing nothing- doesn't that sound glorious? I would love to just have a break and just rest for a couple of weeks. But, I have no spare money or holidays, so it won't be happening anytime soon!

So what I did do was sit down and make a list of all the things that would make me feel happy that I can do now. Things that would make me content! I am the queen of procrastination, so just by doing stuff, I can immediately feel so much better, as I am not racked with guilt about not doing stuff... if that makes sense!

Some of my list includes:

1. Get up and do 1 hour of study before work every weekday: I have been neglecting my PT course I am doing by correspondence as I have no deadlines. So I have been feeling super bad about forking out a load of money and not doing any of it! Well I have done some, but not near as much as I should have. I got up at 5:30am this morning and did my first hour... already feel good about that!

2. Stick to my food and exercise plan: this is something I do pretty regularly, but having strayed from it on the weekend, the guilt is creeping in already! Back to good habits the last couple of days, but will be happier when I start to see the results on the scales. Which brings me to...

3. Weigh myself once a week- I went back to my very bad habit of weighing myself daily! I really go screwy-louie when I do this, as I am on the rollercoaster of my daily weight fluctuations then.

4. Get 8 hours sleep a night. I've started staying up later recently, so want to start making sure I go bed early enough, especially since I want to get up earlier to study! You may say why not study at night then? My brain is dead by that stage! Better to have a sleep and get a fresh head :)

5. Write "To Do" lists at work and work through them. I seem to have become a bit of a scatterbrain as I have got older, so will work better if I do this!

6. Blog only during my breaks at work!! I've got a bit addicted!

So that's the general gist of my list- hopefully by sticking to my list, I will inject some more positivity into my life, and feel a little less like I'm dragging my arse around :)

The non-running blues

I weighed in today with a gain of 0.5kg since last week. I really let myself go a bit crazy towards the end of the week. I used the excuse of "carbo-loading" for the race as an excuse- not good!

I am feeling confident of a good loss this week- I am changing up my exercise program completely after the race, as I am now starting a two month rest from running... I really don't want to, in fact the idea depresses me! But, I have to be sensible, and think about my long term health. The whole reason I started losing weight and exercising was to get healthy, so it is counter-productive to continue running if it causes pain. But as the quote on Emma's blog said, running means more to me than just getting fit and being healthy. It's a challenge- by setting myself goals and beating them, my self-esteem increases. So I guess therein lies the way to cope with this rest from running- I have to find a new non-running goal! Watch this space- I'll have a brainstorm and see what I come up with!

This week might be a light one exercise-wise. I had planned on going to a spin class tonight, but I still have a bit of a head cold, so it might be a good idea to give it a miss and have an early night. I have my parents coming down to visit for the long weekend as well, so any exercise might have to be restricted to whatever I can cram in here and there!!! Here is what I hope to do:

Monday: Rest
Tuesday: Personal training (weights) and cardio machines
Wednesday: Pilates class
Thursday: Personal pilates session
Friday: Rest
Saturday: Treadmill hill walk
Sunday: Outdoor walk (get my Dad out for a walk!)

Hmm, looking at my plan, I think its a good one- I had been contemplating a week off, but I think the plan is light on cardio enough to constitute as a comparatively restful week :) So my aim this week will be to lose my gain and concentrate on sticking to my food plan very closely to make up for the loss in exercise intensity.

Yay- my net time was adjusted!

These were the results posted on the Sydney Running Festival Site:

Bib number: 13225
SHERRIE MORAN
PROSPECT
Place: 3,508 (8, 461 total finishers)
Finish Time: 00:55:55
Net Time: 00:50:43
Gender: Female
Gender Place: 1,405
Category: F20-29
Category Place: 506

Bridge Run 2007

Me at the finish

Dad and I

Thanks Scoop (again!)

Donna and I

What a fabulous day!!! Between the race, having Scoop and my Dad at the finish and getting to meet WW supermodel/Shannan protege/RPM queen Tiny Donna, I have had the best day!

1. The Race

Today ended up being great conditions for the race- sunny but not hot! The race got off to a slow start, taking 5mins just to get across the start line. Once I was across though, it was a nice clear race, where I got to run my own pace for nearly the whole race. My legs felt like lead for the first two km's but soon warmed up and felt comfortable, and had to try and hold myself back so I had enough petrol to last myself the whole race. Then I let rip for the last 3kms. I crossed the line with an official time of 55:55, but it doesn't seem quite right... I kept rough tabs by my analog watch I was wearing, and it seemed like closer to 51 mins. I think perhaps the start gate never registered my proper start time, seeing as the difference equates to roughly how long it took for me to get to the start? Ah well, I know I did good, so that's all that matters!!!

2. Scoop and Dad

It was so cool having Scoop and Dad there to support me! Especially my Dad- we're from a small town called Scone, 4 hours away from Sydney, so it was a real treat to have my Dad in town to see my effort. And Scoop has been a fabulous support for all my races- he puts up with my whinging about my achey bits, and gets up early for the races and travels in with me, and carries my backpack around till I finish. Poor bloke felt like a packhorse for the C2S with my big bag of food and water! I'm a lucky girl to have such lovely boy!

3. Tiny Donna

It was so wonderful to meet Donna in person finally! It just cemented in my mind what a beautiful person she is- just so lovely and nice! I was so excited that she made the effort to come and see us runners! And to come up to where my family and I were having drinks after the race- I really appreciated it Donna! Can you tell how blown away I was from the meeting by all the exclaimation marks I've used :) I hope this is the start of a great friendship, as I would be honoured to have such a cool person in my life.

Well done to Nic, Katie P and Kate A on their efforts! Especially Kate- I am in awe of your achievement! You are my idol! Hope everyone recovers well x

Pork Pie won :)

Had a lovely night last night- Scoop did end up coming into the city with me, so we headed to the Lord Nelson. Got a bit lost and walked the long way, but I was happy enough with that, as it meant I got in a bit of bonus calorie burning! I had a small pork pie for starters- I was happy that the one we had was far less fatty than the ones I use to eat in England! Then I went and had a sensible main course of Thai beef salad. But I couldn't help myself- I had some chocolate pudding for dessert! It was a posh small serving though, but very good quality chocolate! Yum!! Very tasty and enjoyable!! Had a lovely evening with Scoop as well- its been a while since we did something fun together, so will have to make a point of getting out more!!

Feeling a bit under the weather with a head cold, so looking forward to having an early night tonight!! Was planning on doing a run and possibly going to yoga that is starting back up at our gym, but will see how I feel when I finish up this afternoon. Want to give myself the chance to be 100% for Sunday's run!!!

Sushi or Pork Pie!

I'm looking forward to tonight as I am going into the city to pick up my event kit for the Bridge Run. I just love going into the city- it has such an exciting vibe, and as I love shopping, its like heaven on earth to me!! I have two possible scenarios for tonight though- if Scoop gets off work at reasonable time, we are both going in for a bit of a night out. There is a pub that we want to check out at the top of Kent St called the Lord Nelson. They brew their own ale and serve traditional English pub food. I read on their website that they have pork pies!!! It is one of my fave foods from when I lived in England- not the most healthy food on the planet, in fact I would rate it as high on the list of fattiest foods! Oh, but so yummy! So I plan on having one if we go, plus a pint of pale ale :)

The other scenario is if Scoop can't get off from work in time, is that I go in, eat sushi (way healthier than a pork pie!) and go try on posh frocks in the Pitt St Mall! Either way, I am going to be one happy happy girl! Hmmm and I just got an email saying there is a sale on at George with nothing over $100.... ohhh watch out!

Possible new exercise plan

I've been doodling on my notepad as I often do trying to come up with a new exercise plan, and I think this is what my new schedule will look like:

Monday: Spin class
Tuesday: PT session (weights) and cardio machines
Wednesday: Pilates (mat class)
Thursday: Pilates (PT)
Friday: Cardio machines, weights and yoga
Saturday: Rest
Sunday: Cardio machines & weights

My PT is meant to be helping me set up a weights/resistance program this Saturday, which I hope to do at least 24 sessions before Christmas as part of the Countdown to Christmas challenge. I've written "Cardio machines" above- what I plan on doing is a mix of the crosstrainer, bike and rowing machine... the big one though is the rowing machine. I am absolutely crap on that machine, so I will use that as my new challenge! I am going to miss running, but hopefully conquering the rowing machine will help fill the void!

Pilates-tastic!

This wonderful looking contraption is one of the machines we use in my private Pilates session. It looks like a torture rack hey? Well it can be torture for my abs!!! Its called a reformer, and this is what is going to help my get rid of the jelly belly!
I really enjoy my private Pilates session- really feel like it helps a lot with my core strength- also I walk with a lot more consciousness of my posture. I have had terrible slouched shoulders for years, partly due to lack of confidence! But slowly its getting better, as I keep correcting myself more.

Had a really good food day yesterday- stuck to my plan, and didn't feel hungry, so managed to stop myself from unplanned snacking! Have struggled with that the last couple of weeks.

Just thinking now how I had planned on giving up running for a couple of months after the Bridge Run to let my body repair. I am really going to miss my runs!!! I had planned on taking up swimming in its place... I'll have to put some thought into what my new exercise schedule will comprise of, especially as I now want to increase my weights/resistance training as well. I'll post a proposed new plan shortly!!

New week with no mistakes in it

I feel really positive this morning for some reason. I have a clean slate to work from and I am keen to make this week a super good week. Last week I was really unsettled with my routine thrown out the window, and as a consequence my exercise and food planning was all over the place. It wasn't awful, but it wasn't spot on the mark. I had a loss of 1kg this week, but know I could have lost more if I really applied myself.

So this week.... still a bit out of my routine, but I can plan around it. I have to train it into the city on Thursday night so I can pick up my event kit for the Bridge Run. Hoping Scoop can get off early enough so we can both go in and have a lovely romantic dinner- not done that for a while! Then its the Bridge Run itself on Sunday. I did a 9km run yesterday afternoon and felt really comfortable, so I am looking forward to the Bridge Run! It is going to be so much fun running on the Harbour Bridge! And my Dad is even going to be in Sydney and is coming to see me at the finish! And possibly my sister and her fiance are coming to visit.... I can't wait!

So with all these happenings in mind, I have the following plan for exercise this week:

Monday: Pump
Tuesday: Treadmill Run & Pilates PT
Wednesday: Pilates class
Thursday: Rest (night in city)
Friday: Treadmill run
Saturday: Cardio machines and PT session (weights)
Sunday: Bridge Run!

Stocked up on good food yesterday, so I'm all set for a good week!

Mucking around with Mia

Off from work sick today, so just having a squiz at people's blog's. Here is Mia checking out Tiny Donna's blog:
Do I look sick? Maybe not!! This is my first go at a self-portrait in ages- it took 6 goes till I got one I was happy with!!!!

New week!

Ok, I'll get the bad news out of the way first- I put on 2.5kg over my bad week!!!

Ok, so the good news is, I'm back on board the healthy living train, and confident of ditching the gain soon!

The big question- will I continue to rollercoaster through my life, putting on 2kg, then trying to lose it again? Is that what "normal" people do? My guess is that I should be aiming to enjoy food occasionally, but do everything in moderation, not pig out, like I am known to do. Hmmmm... I reckon finding the balance on maintenance might be just as hard as losing the weight in the first place.

Anyway, as I figure it all out, I'm going to focus for now on losing the gain and getting to my personal goal- and I'm feeling quite positive as I write this about doing that!!!

In other news, we named the kitten Mia, and she is going great- getting bigger, her eyes are clearing up a bit, and we have an appointment to see a veterinary ophthamologist to see what we can do for her long term... I can hear the pennies dribbling out of my bank account already! It's all for a good cause- she is such a sweetheart!!!

Going to be a tough week

I'm not looking forward to this week- I have so much on, and I am tired already. Its TTOM and I'm waiting to hear if my kitten is to be handed a death sentence- so I feel pretty drained. We are meant to be going out for dinner with one of Scoop's mates who is in town one night this week, then I have a two day course where the food is provided, and then we travel up to my parents' place for the long weekend. I've already come to grips with the fact that the opportunities to get to the gym are going to be slim this week! And faced with different food temptations, its going to be tough week on the weight-loss front...

Ok, so here is how I am going to deal this week!

Food: So for my course where the food is provided, its meant to be a hot and cold buffet. I'll stick to the salad, a bread roll and some lean meat. I'll take apples and low cal snack bars for morning and afternoon tea to avoid the biscuits!!! I've also bought some Equal tablets to have in my tea. Up at Scone I'll go to the supermarket on Friday to stock up on "Sherrie" food, so I have an alternative to my parents' treats!!!

Exercise: Not looking good! Travelling back to Scone Thursday night, and meant to be going out for tea probably Wednesday night. So my only aim is to get 3 x runs ins. I'll do one tonight on the treadmill, one on Friday and Sunday in Scone. Also on Saturday, I thought I might borrow my brother's bike and go for a ride.

The aim of the game this week will be to maintain my big loss from last week! Fingers crossed for me.

Piccies of the Kitten!

Oh, just one little thing I forgot....

I'm under WW goal :) Now for my personal goal of 65kg- onwards and downwards!!

Unbelievable

I have had the most amazing weigh-in ever this morning: I lost 3kg this week. Its amazing because I am comparatively little but I still lost a massive amount! I mean, I could lose big amounts when I was big, but now? Wow, what else can I say. I certainly worked for it though. I nailed my food and exercise plan. I didn't go to pump on Saturday as my darling bf wanted the car (later found out for ring shopping!), but I went to a boxing class later in day- whoa! What a massive class that was... my upper body is pretty weak, so it copped a hiding... between combinations we were doing push-ups, which is the one exercise I am completely crap at! Then I went for a 9km run yesterday around Seven Hills, so got some quality fat burning in on the weekend. And I stuck very strictly to my food plan for the weekend, which I never have done. So not once did I dip into my "bonus points". The best week yet!

It was an eventful weekend besides the weight-loss adventures- I took home a kitten that was rescued from the roof cavity at work. The poor little thing was rubbing at its eyes, so we took it to the vets, and she told us she has been born with under-developed eyelids, so has the eyelashes pointing in at the eye and has caused one of her cornea's to ulcerate. We are waiting to hear from her today after speaking to an eye specialist. The vet has warned us that it may be hideously expensive to treat if there is a treatment, and we may have to put her down. I was shattered, as I am already in love with her! I cried most of the day. After Scoop came home from the footy, he told me we may have the money to treat her, as he has been saving for an engagement ring!!! So I was doubly over the moon: that he was saving for that, and that we may be able to afford to treat my little princess!!! As the weekend has progressed and she has been eating more, she has become such an affectionate, playful, happy girl. It would break my heart to put her down! I've taken some pics, so I'll upload them when I get home tonight- she is adorable :) Can you tell I'm a besotted mum?

Entry is in!

Well, I put my entry in for the Bridge Run today, so looking forward to that now! It is going to be such a surreal experience to run across the Harbour Bridge! I can't wait! Hopefully Sydney will turn on some gorgeous spring weather like it is at the moment... just thinking while I am typing, if it is sunny, I'm going to boil! I'll have to buy a hat- a lesson learnt from the C2S! The only thing that really bugged me on the C2S was the sun in my eyes. Its gonna be so much fun!!!

Up 1kg, but truly, I'm cool with it!

So today was weigh-in, and I did gain 1kg from last week. But as I described in my last post, that's no big deal, because I am back to being good today, and next weekend has no plans, so I am confident I will lose that 1kg this week. I know my body well enough that it can quickly drop the weight after I indulge if I go back to my healthy eating habits. The big question is though, do I have the guts to go after goal next week and really blast the scales out of the water? I'll work on just losing the 1kg though, anything else is a bonus, cause I know I will eventually get back to goal, its just a matter of time :)

I thoroughly enjoyed my weekend- I ended up holding my first proper big BBQ with rellos and friends of rellos who were in town. It was great for Scoop as well, as he learnt the art of cooking meat en masse on the barbie like all good Aussie men should know! I made my first attempt at cooking my mother's classic BBQ dessert recipe, pecan pie. Everyone rated it, especially Scoop, cause that means I can make it for him whenever instead of waiting for a family occasion!

Even though it was busy with the BBQ and having rellos staying over, I managed to stick to my exercise plan for last week, so really happy with that- I would hate to think what the scales would have said if I hadn't! So in light of successfully feeling guilted into doing exercise even when I didn't want to cause I had posted on here, here is this week's plan!!!

Monday- Pump
Tuesday- Run (treadmill)
Wednesday- Pilates
Thursday- Run (treadmill)
Friday- Rest
Saturday- Pump
Sunday- Run (outdoor)

Epiphany!

I had a realisation this week that has made me feel like I am actually starting to achieve a mental goal in my weight loss journey: I will never be overweight again, so there is no need to freak out about putting on a 1kg if I have an indulgent couple of days, ie go on holiday or go visit my parents. I am consistently losing weight, and will do so until I decide to maintain. There is no use wasting energy on feeling guilty- that is a major thing for me. I am always feeling guilty about something in my life, and for the last two years its usually had something to do with what I put in my mouth!

To put this to practice, Scoop and I went to Lone Star with my brother and his partner last night, and I had BBQ ribs and they were delicious. I toyed with the idea of having grilled salmon, but I hardly ever go to Lone Star, and I really love their ribs, so I was going to have them! But that's ok, because today I'm back to my normal healthy eating, and whatever "damage" I've done, will soon be gone, even more quickly if I do the run I had planned tonight! Because one thing I have known for some time is this a lifestyle for me now- eating healthily is a habit. Indulging in what I like occasionally is ok and enjoyable, and not something to feel bad about at the time or days after the fact- this is something I am only just now embracing. Wow... I am starting to let some of my food issues go now, which is a good thing! One thing I had feared is passing them on to my future kids- I don't want them to deal with the demons I have.

Run Sherrie Run!

Here is a pic that Marathon Photos took of me in the City2Surf that I bought a copy of- I look like I'm in zone hey? If it was taken where I think it has been, I am actually looking quizzically at the finish line trying to work out what the heck I am meant to do! It was a little confusing, as you had to go through 3 gates: the first gate gave you a time card. You then had to rip off a small number on your bib and stick it on the time card and hand it to the second gate, then you went through a third gate to pick up your finisher's medal. I struggled to stick my number on the card, as I had no coordination after running for 14 km :) A lovely lady gave me a hand, which was good! I also bought a copy of the photo as a certificate with my name and time on it- very groovy memento for when I'm old and arthritic to convince unbelieving grandchildren!

The week's exercise plan

Ok folks, as promised here is my exercise plan for the week:

Monday: Run (treadmill)
Tuesday: Pilates PT
Wednesday: Pilates class
Thursday: Rest
Friday: Run (treadmill)
Saturday: Pump class (maybe, depends on time of my chiro appt that I have to check)
Sunday: Run (outdoor)

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday's session will be easy to do, but I worry about the "can I be arsed" factor on Friday, Saturday, Sunday!! If I keep reminding myself I am only 0.5kg off goal, that should hopefully fire me up!!

Deja Vu

I weighed in at 68.5kg... I've been here before! A week before I flew out to the UK in May I had 0.5kg to lose to get to goal. The difference this time is that I don't have this enormous pressure on myself to lose that last 0.5kg in one week. Actually this week I have lots of socialising planned, so if I do lose it this week, it will be an incredible feat!

One ace I have up my sleeve this week is that I start running again. I didn't run this last week to give myself every chance to recover fully from the C2S. But I am stuck into it again this week, so the break from it might be a good shock to my body to get that last bit of weight moving.

I was pretty disciplined over the weekend foodwise. I stuck to my plan fairly closely- my only downfall was Saturday night- I polished off a bottle of red, had a couple of rows of Cadbury Dairy Milk and made pita chips which I ate a ton of (2 big pitas with garlic, herbs, olive oil). So in the big picture it wasn't the biggest blowout ever, but it still wasn't good! My proudest achievement was Friday night- just one small glass of red and some air-popped popcorn to watch the footy with. That is usually my worst night where I just go crazy and let myself off the hook completely because its the end of the week.

So for the challenge this week, my focus is going to be completing all the exercise I have planned. I'll sit down and make the plan today and post it up on here later. As I have two lots of visitors coming to stay, it will be a fantastic effort if I can get it all done! But at least if I get it done I will have less guilt from my socialising!

Official time

Just got the paper- my official time for the C2S was 92.21- I'm a happy chappy :)

City 2 Surf 2007

Here are some piccies taken before and after the big race! It was such a fab day, and I was glad to share it with my mate Carla. Such an awesome experience- one of the best things I've ever done... but now the euphoria is wearing off and I am achey and sleepy.... early to bed tonight!

This is my mate Carla and I where we met up outside Town Hall station before the race... Scoop reckons I look a bit hyper :)

And this is us after the race at Bondi- a bit more tired, but still looking happy!

Yes, here is proof I got to Bondi- you can now see the beach :) and the beginnings of a very bad sunburn! Don't tell my Mum!

The view of Bondi Beach from the south end.

I rock!

Ok, I've already been told I have a big head this morning, but I think I'm fab right now :) I ran the City to Surf! I am still flabbergasted... never in a million years did I think I would be capable of doing it. But even more surprising to me was how well I did it- I felt really strong and comfortable the whole run, even up Heartbreak Hill! I feel like I am up on top of the world right now! My time card said 102 min, so with the start time adjustment, it should be closer to 90 min, so even playing dodgem cars with the other runners, I got a good time! The official results come out on Tuesday in the SMH, so I'll post my time up then :)

Watch this space- Scoop took some piccies before at Town Hall and after at Bondi that I will post tonight!

Other news- I had a loss of 0.5kg this week, so pretty happy with that considering I ate junk like there was no tomorrow on the weekend... I kept telling myself it was "energy food"! This week I should be better as I have a nice quiet weekend planned.

Week 1 of Back to Basics Challenge= -0.5kg

This week has been a pretty good one for me- I've completed Week 1 of the "Back to Basics" Challenge with Jenn, and I lost 0.5kg. I'm happy with that loss as I got my period today, and the scale wavered and looked like I might be a bit less than 69.5kg... but I'll be happy to take a big loss next week!

The big thing about this week was that it was my first week doing the WW points plan, and I really enjoyed it! My big problem was that I got blase by the end of the week, and couldn't be bothered any more. So my goal for this week will be to track my points on the weekend as well. But I will eat back some of my exercise points on Saturday and Sunday to fuel and refuel for the City to Surf. Otherwise I will be a walking zombie on Monday at work, still being too knackered!

It's all a bit scary now- I'm getting nervous about the run. My only goal is to run the whole way- if I can do that I will be stoked! Then I think I will have a rest from running for a couple of weeks, to let my body heal up from the punishment I've been dishing out to it. I'm in two minds as to whether I will do the Bridge Run towards the end of September, so I've decided I will leave my decision to the end of the month to see how I am feeling.

Bay Run 2007

Well folks- I did it- I've done my first running race! I completed the Bay Run this morning. It was an early start, with the women's race starting at 8:15am, so Scoop and I were up for 6! On a Sunday that must be illegal! We made our way across to Iron Cove in the cold (as you can see from the photos below) and waited for the start. The race was pretty good, quite well-organised with the bus lane closed across Iron Cove bridge, and lollypop men stopping traffic for the couple of roads we had to cross. I suffered from a couple of stitches in the race- which is weird for me, so it must have been nerves. I used a lady who was always slightly ahead of me to set my pace by, so whenever I dropped further behind, I upped the pace. In the last km I put pedal to the metal, and got a time of just over 43 min (have to wait for the official results to come out to find out for sure!). So was pretty pleased that I got a time that I expected- definitely a worthwhile race! Scoop said he reckoned I would have come about a third of the way through the pack in the women's race, so thats pretty good :)

Me at 6:15 am in the morning: never a good look, especially some one taking a picture!

Walking up from the car to the starting area- taking advantage of a good picture opportunity!

Looking unimpressed by the cold/another unwanted photo!

Piccie of me with the view of Iron Cove- looking decidedly cold!

Racing towards the finish line!!

I did it! I finished my first race!

Stretching my glutes :) Thanks again Scoop... :P

No Scoop, the ambulance isn't for me!

I hurt bad after the race, especially my left hip flexor, but a big long soak in a hot bubble bath and lots of stretches soon sorted me out!

In other news, I did put on 0.5kg this week. The lesson I learnt this week was that a big run doesn't give me a licence to eat loads of junk food! As my mate Jenn is struggling was perserverence as well, we've decided to start a "Back to Basics" challenge. I'm gonna switch my weigh-ins to Monday to coincide with hers, and to keep me on the straight and narrow on the weekends as well!

Watch out C2S

Well, I did it! I did my big run- but I didn't just settle for 13km- I did 14km... the length of the C2S. I did it in 1hr and 32min... so its slower than my 9 and 11km pace (9.1km/h versus 9.4km/h) but my excuse is blisters. Big blisters- in fact blisters on top of old blisters on my foot arches! I managed to run the distance with them, with the pain kicking in at around the 5km mark. To add to my list of pains, I also had groin pain, hip pain, a little bit of knee pain :) So yesterday I was a cripple, and hobbled around like the old woman I have been behaving like, but today? Quite good suprisingly!!! Nothing creaked as badly as it was been doing. So maybe all this stretching and manipulating is starting to pay off. So I have some good news to report to the physio when I ring him. Maybe I won't have to give up running just yet!!!

My weekend has been not bad... I've had a couple of afternoon naps. I needed to as recovery from my big run! Last night Scoop and I went a local Indian restaurant which was delicious, and full of Indian families having catch-up and celebratory meals- it's gotta be good if Indians eat there!!! I tried this different type of entree: "bhupari" which is meant to be a "popular street snack"- it was like spicy Rice Bubbles!!! Very different! And mains was delicious, but will have to remember to come with a very empty stomach next time... nearly had to roll us out the door we were that full!

My body

I had a loss of 1kg this week, which has really surprised me! Why? Because I am consuming more calories than what I was before my UK trip! So I've been thinking about why I might have had such a good loss. It could be that I did a 11km run last weekend, or the fact I am eating completely different foods to what I normally do, so the variety is keeping my body on its toes! More than likely its a combination of those things. I feel really good at the moment, other than the fact my body feels sore and battered from all the running :)

My orthotics gave me big blisters on my foot arches when I went for 7km run on the treadmill on Wednesday- not fun! They seem to have healed up pretty quickly, but the big test will be my 13km tomorrow- I'm trying to prepare myself for the possibility that I may not be able to hack it if they start to blister again! And my hips are still sore despite all the stretching and manipulation I've been doing. I'm hoping then this is a slow fix- I hate to think it was all for nothing.

I've already decided that after my "running season", ending with the Bridge Run, I'm gonna cut it right back. I know my body needs a break from the pounding on the pavement. I'll still do a regular run on the treadmill every week, to keep that side of my fitness up, but I think maybe I should take on another challenge- swimming. I am a useless swimmer- and swimming will be much kinder to my body. My family is full of people whose bodies are a wreck: my Dad needs knee replacements, my Mum has had spinal fusion surgery and still spends many of her days in bed, and my sister has dodgey knees and has had knee surgery. I don't want to join the list of casualities! I started running to help push onto my goal weight, and thus improve my health- it seems a bit silly to insist on continuing running if it means I'll be a cripple. I love running, and how it has made me feel if I can achieve with my running I can achieve with anything. But I hate the fact I am in pain the next day and hobble along holding my hips like an old lady!

Hips don't lie

Well, just come back from the physio and have a plan of attack to sort out my sore hips. First thing the physio did was get me to take my shoes off- and then he looked at how my ankle and arches all lined up. I have functional collapses in my feet, so I tried out a few different orthotics to put in my shoes. So hopefully thats now sorted! Then he went through a bunch of stretches that I have try and do 3 times a day! He joked I may have to revert to part time work to do all the stretching needed :) Then it was time to have a look at my hips- I almost jumped off the bed in pain when he manipulated my iliotibial tract- the tendon that runs down the outside of your thigh to the outside of your knee, from your hip. So he worked on trying to release that, while I tried not to yell in pain. The side that I have had the worst pain in was the side I had to ask him to stop, I was in that much pain. He told me I needed to work on releasing that muscle while in shower by pressing my knuckles into the tract moving my knuckles in an upward direction only.

The good news- he didn't say to stop running!!!!

So fingers crossed I will be in fine form again soon!

Officially back on track

I weighed in today with 2.5kg loss- so back down to 70.5kg. I feel in a much better place to keep going onto my goal now. A few weeks ago when I weighed this weight, I didn't try to overcome any temptations, as I still wasn't in the right headspace. I feel much more confident that I can improve on this weight next week. I'm not going to stress myself out about it, like I did leading up to the UK trip. I'll be happy to chip away at it 0.5kg at a time. So that should have me at goal in 5 weeks time. I hope though it will be a little faster as I get right into my training for the next couple of weeks for the C2S. But on the other hand, I don't want to starve myself during this time to get a big loss if it means I'm not fuelling myself enough for my training. One of my workmates today told me she is so worried about how little I eat that she reckons one day she'll have to do first aid on me! I told her not to stress, as I am consuming more calories now than before the UK trip. I am also trying analyse my diet to address any deficiencies. I realise since I've been doing weight-loss for so long, I am probably quite low with my essential fatty acids, so this week coming I plan to eat some nuts and salmon to try to address that. I am probably low on iron, so looking to increase that as well. So see if that helps me feel a bit more lively!!!

Weight-loss is such a balancing act... I guess it comes down to making sure that everything that you put in your mouth is going to do something to contribute towards your nutrition. The other balancing act for me is with exercise- trying to increase my fitness without wrecking my body. I am suffering chronic pain in my hips, and have done for several months. It has increased in intensity as my running intensity has increased as well. So I am taking myself off to the physio next week to hopefully start finding a remedy for it. I just hope they don't tell me to rest for 6 weeks, since I have gone and put my C2S entry in.... fingers crossed!!

This time I know its for real...

Crunch time finally arrived- yay!!! I've been waiting for that spark of something to ignite my desire to be at goal again, and it finally arrived on Friday. My weigh-in day. It was a terrible result, but just what I needed to give me back my steely resolve. I weigh 73kg. Bloody awful- 5 kg from goal! Up till yesterday, I just wasn't bothered. Just ate what I feel liked, when I felt like it. It hasn't helped I was ill last weekend I guess, but now I feel great, and I am ready to rip into it. I've set myself the challenge of a perfect WW week. Its 2:15pm on Saturday, and so far, so good. If I can get through tonight without giving into temptation, I'll be doing ok! Its when you have a few and then go... I'll just have this chocolate bar from the vending machine, or I might have some cake from the bistro, that things start to unravel! It helps that I am broke- the week before pay day is always a great means of avoiding indulgence!

Today, I bought the tools by which I can get back into my running with avengeance- a treadmill and some new joggers. My old ones have done a great job to cop the abuse I gave it this last year and a bit, but they have started to rub, and so I thought better to get some new ones this week, so they are broken in for the City to Surf. Speaking of which, I put in my entry for the race yesterday... I told you my resolve and determination has come back :) And with a treadmill at home, it means Scoop doesn't feel so neglected by me going off to the gym every night, and he has the means to start getting fit as well! Its win win!.... Maybe not for my credit card....

Some Scotland Pictures

Well, since we have now got our PC at home up and running, I thought I might upload some piccies from Scotland!

This is me at Glencoe- by far one of the prettiest bits we saw (hey I'm even brave enough to wear horizontal stripes these days!)

Picture of Nessie at Loch Ness :)

My mate Cora pictured in "Monarch of the Glen" country.

Scotland was an absolutely stunning place to drive around. So glad I was able to convince my usually non-touristy mate to come on the tour!

"Get real" time

Well, I've been in limbo weight loss wise since I've been back from the UK- just haven't been in the right headspace to get rid of what I gained on holidays. Last night I went the gym and tried to do the run on the treadmill using the speed, incline and duration my personal trainer set for me and I couldn't do it- I gave up after 22 min.

I came home feeling so disappointed, and completely and utterly exhausted. Mentally and physically. Then the rational thinking decided to bustle its way into my misery. The program that my trainer had set is too challenging for me. That is the bottom line. I am asking too much of myself. I believe the program would have been super challenging even at the level of fitness I was before I left for the UK, let alone after losing a bit of my fitness. So I decided I should sit down and come up with a plan that I knew I was capable of and would hopefully get me to some semblence of fitness required for the City to Surf. I also have been thinking about doing some PT sessions with another trainer to accelerate the process, and also get their advice on the program I come up with.

This will "Part A" of my "Get Real" plan. Part B is diet. Its time to get serious about getting to goal. I jumped on the scales this morning to have a look-see and low and behold, I am 1kg up from last week (71.5kg). Not surprising after the junk I ate on the weekend. So tonight I plan to sit down and plan what I will eat in the next week as well as my exercise plan. Let's see if I can get positive again!

Yay for Jenn!

Good news is my WW online mate Jenn has reached goal!!! 32.7kg she has lost, which is an awesome effort! I know she is keen to lose a few more, but she should be so proud of the enormous effort she has put in to get to where she has got. The amount of challenges she has faced to get to this point makes the feat even more fantastic- I've never known someone with such a hectic social life! Congratulations Jenn- bask in that fabulous achievement- you are a star! No, you're a galaxy :)

1.5kg down- 2.5kg to go!

Well, I am starting to get through the 4 kg gain I got from my holiday- I dropped 1.5kg this week which is a good start. So back down to 70.5kg... at least I'm in my healthy weight range again! The week got off to a disappointing start when I couldn't do the 40 min run my trainer had set for me on the treadmill- I was faint after 30 min, so I quit. But last night I was determined to do it, and tricked my body into thinking I was gonna only do 30 min, then another 5, then another 5! I'll have to buy some new joggers soon, as these ones are starting to rub near the balls of my feet. *Sigh* have to spend more money! The credit card took a battering on the holiday, and it looks like it is set to continue for a few months yet!

The big news is I have signed up for my personal training course! It is through the Australian Institute of Personal Trainers, and they have a course that combines Certificate III and IV in Fitness. It is theory by correspondence, then once I have passed that, I do 100 hours face-to-face with a personal trainer mentor, so lots of practical which is good. Can't wait to start!!

And the journey continues...

Well, its been a while, but here I am again! The big news is, I did reach goal the day I flew out to the UK. It was very exciting, but so was the idea of jumping on a plane and going to the UK! My holiday was fabulous. It was choca block full of socialising and shopping, and a bit of touristy stuff- obligatory for an Aussie in the UK! Received loads of compliments on my weight loss, and even had a couple of people walk right past me and not recognise me! Lots of fun. As a consequence, I spent a lot of time while socialising talking about how I did it. I think I have converted Scoop's sister and my best mate over there to the idea of running.

I finally got on the scales this morning for the first time since I weighed in at goal- I am up to 72kg. I wasn't really that worried about it until I typed it out just now. But one thing I do know how to do is to lose weight, so I should take heart in that fact and not get upset and just start to make every choice count!!! From now... not in a few days, or next week- now!!

One thing the trip, and the ensuing jet-lagged induced sleepless nights has made me realise is that I need to put my plan of becoming a personal trainer into action. It all makes perfect sense to do it- I love helping people, I have an interest in fitness and sport science since losing weight so I would enjoy the study, and working as personal trainer would provide me with opportunity of having flexible working hours for when Scoop and I start our family. So I am doing lots of research at the moment trying to work out which course is the most affordable, flexible and reputable... all very exciting! And scary... the idea of changing careers is a bit daunting to say the least.

0.5kg

I have 0.5kg to lose until I've reached my goal weight- this is... how shall I describe it? Amazing, incomprehensible, exciting? Those words are good ones! An emotion I felt this morning was relief- relief that I had lost 1kg for the week, after last week's no loss. One thing that that no loss week gave me was a sense of never letting myself get relaxed about how easy it is to lose weight. You can't indulge a bit here and indulge a bit there and still expect to lose weight. That's something I have to guard against this weekend in Scone. If I really want to be at goal for the UK then I really have to commit to making good choices this weekend, and not take for granted I will lose 0.5kg just from pre-menstrual bloat! Because to be honest, I'm not feeling particularly bloated today!

Really looking forward to this weekend- Scoop and I are going up to Scone for Mum's 50th and for Mother's Day. Scone Horse Festival is on as well, so there is plenty going on, so will get to show Scoop what its all about! Would have been better if we could have been up there for the following weekend for the Scone Cup- Scoop would appreciated the all-day drinking session much more than a parade I think :)

Always look on the bright side of life!

Well, not feeling quite so negative today as I was yesterday. I did go to the spin class last night and it was good- would definitely do it again! A lady beside me said I could expect a sore butt afterwards, and when I got home, I had no pain, so I thought I got off lightly, but alas I woke up with it :) I feel like I went easy on myself in the class, but my quads were sore last night as well, so I must have worked them!

I also made a big effort to up my water consumption. I average a little over 2L a day plus maybe 0.5L at the gym, but yesterday I got stuck in and had 3L plus a little at the gym. I've changed up my normal breakfast and lunch, and signed up for the new class on Wednesday night, so I am leaving no stone unturned in this charge towards goal!

After I got home from the gym last night, I sat on the lounge with Scoop, and realised I felt so much more relaxed than what I have been- I think I finally let myself off the hook with all the pressure I have put on myself! Whatever happens, happens- all I can do is try my best. You can't say I haven't tried!

Irrational Negativity

I haven't posted on here in a while now, but I am thinking that's just what I need at the moment- somewhere I can reason through the turmoil that is engulfing my mind. As the title of the post suggests, I am feeling negative about my weighloss journey at the moment, but I know it to be an irrational negative feeling. Since I last posted, I lost a kg- happy days, but last weigh-in I lost nothing. It's since then that I have felt depressed. Its ridiculous I know- I have lost 32.5kg in total, and I look fabulous compared what I use to. Its going to be great to see everyone's reaction in the UK in a couple of week's time. But I had such a major desire to be at goal for when I got there, so I could say that's it!!! I completed the mammoth task! I've tried to take the pressure off myself by telling myself its ok if I don't make it, but I guess I'm not buying it at the moment! Dumb, I know, but I can't help what I feel... well I can, I just have keep trying to convince my heart with what my brain knows to be true- they are going to blown away, no matter if I still have 1.5kg to go. I guess I wanted to be at goal also, as I know I am going to put on weight while I am over there with all the socialising I'll be doing, I just wanted to get to goal before I pile more on again!!!!!

I am fearful my body has hit a bit of a plateau, so just in case, I am thinking of shaking up my exercise routine this week. I have to anyway, as they have a new class on when I would normally do Pump, so I am thinking about doing the replacement class (like Pump, but with some cardio chucked in, and different ways of lifting the weights) and instead of doing Body Combat tonight, bite the bullet and do the one class I have been scared of- the Spin class! It is meant to be the mother of all group classes for the amount of calories you burn doing it. So watch this space! We'll see how a change affects me. I am so worried.... please, please let me lose 1.5kg before I go the UK!!!

Healthy weight!

I am so stoked- this week I managed to lose my gain from last week, and another kg! So that means, I am now no longer overweight! This is a massive achievement, as never have I been a healthy weight in living memory... wow. I can't get over it still. I feel like apart of my identity has disappeared- the "fat" part of me. The scary thing is, I don't know how I am meant to operate as a normal sized person. Am I now meant to exude more confidence? Am I now meant to fulfil my potential? Whatever my potential is? It will take me a while to wrap my head around this new change in me.

I now have 2.5kg to go to goal weight, so it full steam ahead for me! 68kg here I come :)

An Easter gain

Well- I buggered it up! I had such a lovely plan and because I didn't follow it, I got a gain. Plus I have pre-menstrual bloat, so between choccies and that, I gained 0.5kg this week. I am disappointed, but at least I understand why I have gained. There would nothing worse than putting in loads of effort and having nothing to show for it. I was extremely good the last 3 days, and most of the weekend was good, but Sunday was blowout day! Bacon and egg roll, massive baked lunch with sticky date pudding and apple pie, and a small box of Roses chocolates... I don't think I've consumed so many calories in one day in ages!!!! I felt ill afterwards as well, so its no wonder!

While I understand why I have gained, the actual fact I have gained has meant I feel further away from my goal- I have 5 weeks to lose 4kg. Sounds a lot different to 3.5kg in 6 weeks... I feel frustrated at the moment. I just want to get goal now!!! As you might be able to tell, its doing my head in a bit. I guess because I feel deprived... so maybe I need to start having small treats regularly instead of this all or nothing mentality. I just dunno!

I think my biggest problem is that I feel fatigued with all this effort. Maybe if I get to make time to chill out a bit this weekend I will feel a renewed enthusiasm for this task. Because it is a worthwhile task, making myself healthy!

Early weigh-in with a great result!

I weighed-in yesterday (Thursday) and have lost 1kg for the week!! I was stoked that even a day early I recorded such a good loss. Its given me great motivation for this weekend- so far I have resisted the temptation of lollies on the car trip up to my parents, chocolate biscuits when we got home, and hot-cross buns this morning!!! I have sat down and planned what food I am eating and when, and I feel very in control. That is unlike my time normally at home, when I act like I have no control over what I eat. So I am really excited about my next weigh-in already!

Still going down

Well this is the week where I learnt the lesson that if you eat lots of bad things you will not lose lots of weight :) Sounds like commonsense right? Well I have had this mindset of if it happens on the weekend, it doesn't count- you have five days to burn it off!!! Well I certainly did burn it off, and a bit more, but didn't get the 1kg I was hoping for- I had a loss of 0.5kg. So I am pleased, as its a good loss, but I am fighting my complacency hard at the moment. There are little things I am starting to get sick of when it comes to dieting... like having sweetner in my tea. It really does make it taste crap, but to me, going without something sweet is worse. And when I am out and about, feeling the pressure to make a good choice. I eat healthily all week, and you just want to have something a bit different and yummy when you are out, not another blooming salad!

The thing that is stopping me from giving up altogether is the fact that I am so close to goal, and I am seeing the results on the scales, and I have great support (thanks Jenn :) ). I WILL get to 68kg, and I will do it in the near future!!!

Close call

I didn't post last week as I have been super busy! Basically I had no loss last Friday, due to me being PMS-y and exhausted, and indulging in wine and cheese! This week I was headed for another no loss week as I was super-stressed at work and decided the only way I could cope was to eat lots of lollies. I managed to polish off a packet and half's worth! But rather than get cranky at myself about it, I decided to take it on some cardio machines at the gym and my pump bar :) It paid off because I managed to get a loss of 1kg this week. I reckon about half of that was loss of my PMT bloat, but I'm happy to take it :) So to deal with work stress in the future I'm going stock up on some different teas... as for PMS... who knows??? Any suggestions gratefully accepted :)

Mini Goal Reached

Today I weighed in at my mini goal of 74kg, which is a loss of 1 kg this week. Really happy that I achieved this, as I was sure any loss this week would be modest after indulging on the weekend when I visited my parents! I promised myself 2 new gym outfits when I reached 74kg, but I think I may have to settle for one, as things are a bit tight money-wise! Besides, reaching 74kg is a reward in itself :)

I've been doing 25 min runs for the C25K program this week, and its been hard going! I've started listening to my radio on my mobile to help the time go a bit faster, but its all a bit bizarre that you hear people on the radio just blithely chatting away while my lungs feel like they are about to explode!!! But I still think running has helped the rate at which I have losing weight at the moment, so I'll keep working away at it :)

Jenn has been fabulous with her encouraging emails, and has been great in terms of keeping my mind focussed and my eye on the prize! I hope I have helped her as much as she has helped me. We'll soon be at goal and looking and feeling fabulous :)

No loss, but finally have some before and after pics to show!

Well, unfortunately I didn't lose any weight this week. But I on a positive note, I didn't gain either! I know what went wrong- I ate more than I usually do, and exercise was difficult this week, with my muscles feeling like lead. I'm all pumped for this week though, to make the scales move down again!

I have finally got some pictures uploaded of before and after (well not quite after, but getting there!). The first one is of Scoop and I in Nov 04 in front of Sydney Town Hall, and the second one is Nov 06 just before we went off to my 10 year high school reunion.

The difference in weight between the two pics is 22kg (and about 10kgs for Scoop as well!). I've lost another 5 kg since the above pic, but I think its such a nice one so thats why I posted it :)

Kicking butt!

Wow- what a surprise! I had prepared myself for a moderate loss this week, being TTOM and having a few slip-ups food-wise, but I lost 1.5kg this week! I am amazed!! But extremely happy- I'm now only 7kg away from my goal weight.

I credit my loss with the amount of exercise I am doing- with the running being the most important component of that. I had to do 2x8min last night as part of the C25K program and I did feel like I could go on after my 1st lot of 8, so I think I am prepared for my 1st 20min block this weekend.

I am also in a good position motivation-wise. Whenever I am faced with a temptation I think about about Jenn and the girls doing the Biggest Loser Challenge and think "na- I owe it to them to stay strong". And mostly I have! Really in the scheme of things, my few slip-ups fall within my points allowance for the week, but I am so in "the zone" at the moment I perceive any treat as a weakness. So this week I hope to continue as I have done the last few weeks. I have another quiet weekend lined up, so hopefully I will make my mini-goal of 74kg next Friday with a 1kg loss. But after such a big loss this week, I won't hold my breath- I will be happy with 0.5kg loss.

Plateau officially busted!

I've lost another whole kg again this week! I am stoked- this means to me I finally rid myself of the nagging thought I was going to go back up to 78kg again. So onwards and downwards for me!

This week I have continued on with C25K program (Week 4), and found the first session quite easy as I took it easy, so pushed myself last night with my second session and absolutely whacked myself! I kept thinking about how badly I wanted to see a 1kg loss, and my legs went a bit faster! So feeling strong, especially with my first solid run (20 minutes) at the end of next week. That will be a huge milestone for me as I think I will then be able to confidently say "I run, I'm a runner".

Have been pretty strong with my food choices as well, with a couple of treats chucked in, so its all paying off! Will be going for the hattrick next week: 3 in 3 :) Might be a bit more difficult with it being TTOM next week, but I'm going to have a crack anyway!

All Fired Up!

Wow, what a week! At the beginning of the week, my motivation had reduced to a trickle, but now it has increased to a flood! There are a several reasons for this:

1. Got in touch with Jenna in response to her "10kg WW Buddy" post on the WW messageboards, so now I have a really lovely person to share the last 10kg with!

2. The Biggest Loser has started up on the telly again- I find it so inspirational! Half the time after the show, I race out the door and do my Couch to 5km session, all fired up with the theme music in my head!!

3. As a result of 1. I'm in the Biggest Loser Challenge that Jenn is organising- can't wait till that's in full swing!

So all-in-all, a really positive week, culminating in a 1kg loss! Can't be more happier! The biggest thing is that I now believe that I can reach my goal before our trip to the UK in May :)

"Let it go and believe"

Oh Dear

Well, I weighed in today with 0.5kg gain on last week. Initially I was really upset about it, as I have really put a lot of effort in this week with my exercise. Then I remembered all the junk food I ate on my weekend away! (Read: beer, pavlova, Morrocan, bikkies and dip!) So I'm not going to let myself get upset again unless I have a super good week this week and then still not lose weight.

I cheered myself by focussing on a positive from this week: I am doing the second week of the C to 5K program, and am really starting to feel my fitness improve. Before you know it I'll be a runner!

Back on Track

It has taken me a few weeks, but I am back on track! I gained 2kg over Christmas, of which I lost 1.5kg quite quickly when I started back at the gym a week after New Years, but then I've been stuck at 78.5kg for the last two weeks- that was until today! Today I weighed in at 78kg again! Woohoo!

There a couple of reasons for this. The main one I think is the fact I have upped the ante (and will continue to) with my exercise. I've started up with a personal trainer, Tania, at my gym once a week. It has hurt bad, buts its been good, especially last nights session. Also I'm committed to completing the "couch to 5km" program, as described on the Cool Runnings site. I tried Week 2 this week, and while it was hard, it was do-able. The other reason, is that I am tracking my food intake with the Calorie King website, which recently became free. One thing I realised was that maybe I ate too many carbs.... I eat a lot of fruit, which I really never considered as carbohydrate! So I've replaced my afternoon piece of fruit with a handful of mixed natural nuts. Also the website says I eat too little calories some days for the amount of exercise I do... I'm yet to be convinced of this! I know that you can make your body think its gone into starvation mode if you do this often, so it hangs onto the fat. But I won't get too hung up on this until I am fully into the swing of weight-loss mode ie achieve a good week of diet/exercise, and not lose any weight.

I've also set myself some goals with some actual rewards, which I have never done! They are the following:

*One complete week of eating withing calorie limit/healthy eating guidelines: Fashion magazine.
*One week where exercise plan is completed: Colourful Bonds undies.
*Reaching mini-goal of 74kg: Two new gym outfits.
*Reaching ultimate goal of 68kg: Hmm- undecided! Either a really nice handbag, high leather boots (which I always considered myself too big for) or a necklace.